Sunday, 11 December 2011

All I Want For Christmas is a New PC....

This is the fifth day of my blogging marathon, she says, smiling through gritted teeth... and I am popping up again on blogrols and blog readers like a mole hill on a manicured lawn, but let's cheer ourselves with the knowledge that this bizarre experiment will be over on Tuesday. I'm surprised I've got this far. I know what I'm posting on Tuesday [kind of] and today was simply going to be a picture of the freshly decorated Christmas tree in my living room... but since this doesn't exist yet, I can't show you. Maybe I will do the tree today. My tree is a fake one. It came from Woolworths in 1992, so it has seen better days, but by the time I've covered it in tinsel and baubles it barely shows that it's bare. Every year, since 2005, I get it out of its shabby old box and think I really should throw it away, but to be honest I'm a little bit sentimental about it now. Maybe I will have pics tomorrow.
Meanwhile, I have already had a trauma this morning and have already turned the air a scarlet shade of blue. My pc reminds me of the first black and white television my parents owned, which had to be turned on at least half an hour in advance of any programme we wanted to watch; as a child I recall staring at a horizontal black line going down a snowy screen, over and over, before a picture would appear. So frustrating when waiting for the Woodentops.
It takes twenty minutes for my pc to warm up, if I rush it then it goes a bit crazy - security icons flash, warning of great peril, inferring that I'm not protected and that world's going to end, or some such... so I start repeatedly clicking on things and swearing... and we all know that repeated clicking is never going to help in a computer related incident...weird windows pop up... the timer thingy whirls around and around... this morning I had to log off and start again.
Anyhow, I'd better get on... sort this tree business out etc...

39 comments:

  1. About time you traded in your old PC thingie for one of them new Amstrads.

    Oooh, the Woodentops, I'd forgotten all about them. Now I shall spend all morning free-associating with The Clangers, Andy Pandy, and The Magic Roundabout. Now look what you've done.

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  2. Nick: In truth, I only vaguely remember the Woodentops... but it alliterated well and the Wombles were in colour...
    :-)
    Sx

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  3. Haha, we dragged our old 2nd hand tree down out of the attic yesterday. Poor sad thing, dropping fake needles all over the floor.

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  4. Dicky: I'm dreading looking at mine, I was pushing my luck last year... am also dreading fixing the stand to it... hideous hard plastic that always hurts my hands.
    Sx

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  5. Your PC just needs a couple of valves replacing. Then you can watch Iggle Piggle and "In the Night Garden".

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  6. It reminded me of Dear Kaz's appearance on Muffin the Mule.

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  7. And I thought "The Amstrads" was a childrens programme about little grumpy furry faced creatures that point and say "yoolozmemunnnyyy" and "yooofyd!".

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  8. Rog: I had to Google! But then I found this!!!
    Terrifying.
    I googled 'Muffin the Mule Kaz', did she ever show the pic?
    Sx

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  9. I never realised the Woodentops were so middle class - a lady who helps in the houlse and Sam who helps out in the shed or whatever....

    It's as if the Trumpton Riots never happened...

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  10. Can't sell you a PC, but I can do you a Heston Blumethal Xmas pudding for £200.

    Had to laugh at the security word - "gynee".

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  11. Whoops.. I'm back.
    Let me know when you're starting pre prandials...

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  12. It reminds me of the days when cars had a 'choke' and on cold days you pulled it out to start the car then gradually pushed it in as the car warmed up. But if you tried to start the car with the choke out too many times it 'flooded' the engine. Technically geekery. My Netbook/PC is a cheapy, only 1 year old and it needs coaxing on in the mornings, taking nearly 5 mins to warm up,

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  13. Rog: I have found Kaz's Muffin posts HERE.
    :-)

    Macy: Everything on the BBC was middle class... apart from Windy Miller, who got drunk on cider HERE. I believe he went on to start the Trumpton riots.

    Mr Chairman: £200!!! That's my total food budget for 2012!!
    Can it be frozen? Does it go well with oven chips?
    Silly WV.

    Macy: I get the sherry...

    Sx

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  14. Wendy: Oh yes, I remember my Dad doing the choke thing... this is probably when I learnt how to turn the air a scarlet shade of blue.
    Sx

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  15. Hello Scarlet:
    Ahhh, Spotty Dog, now you have made us all nostalgic on this grey morning in Budapest. Bill and Ben the flowerpot men were our absolute favourites and how well we remember staring at the Test Card just waiting for something, anything to appear on the screen.

    A brand new shiny racing speed computer for Christmas......surely not too much to ask? We really hope that one will make its way into your stocking!!!

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  16. The Top Hats: I know, linked to the Woodentops Youtube is Watch with Mother and Picture Box. Happy days.
    I will buy a bigger pair of stockings in anticipation.
    Sx

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  17. Sadly we'll never know but let's assume she was one of these.

    I like the Upsy-Davesie video.

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  18. Rog: Yes, I think this is a good assumption.
    And yes, I did break out in a bout of hysterical laughter when I found the Upsy-Davesie video!
    Sx

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  19. My computer has a black and white monitor and a choke!

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  20. Mr LX: Retro isn't always a good idea, is it?!
    Sx

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  21. Forgot to mention, my fake Christmas tree is an antique, I think it was bought from Woolworths in Hackney about 30 years ago. Still in excellent condition. Real trees are a messy nuisance, potting required and then they shed needles everywhere. Thanks but no thanks.

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  22. Nick: As I said retro isn't necessarily a good idea!!
    I'd like a real tree... I like the smell... but... I always leave it too late.
    Sx

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  23. Scarlet I have to log off and start again most days. I'm getting worried about the language that comes unbidden nowadays.

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  24. Pat: I think I need to log myself off and start again... as I've just read my comment to Nick and it makes no sense in relation to what he wrote!

    Nick: Apologies! What can I say other than an orange kipper tie distracted me.

    Sx

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  25. You're showing your age girl!
    I remember all that stuff, and i'm 50 next month! x

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  26. John: Tsk! I only vaguely remember the Woodentops... they showed repeats for decades and decades back then, didn't they?!

    Sx

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  27. ...er... I can't find the Christmas tree...

    Sx

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  28. You probably have a virus. You might try googling some of the symptoms your computer is having. It might simply be a matter of opening up task manager and killing the process.
    +followed

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  29. Do you think the dinosaur stole your tree?

    I'd forgotten about the Woodentops, my sister loved them! I wonder if she remembers? I'll have to make her a Woodentops christmas card.

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  30. It came from Woolworths in 1992, so it has seen better days, but by the time I've covered it in tinsel and baubles it barely shows that it's bare. Every year, since 2005, I get it out of its shabby old box
    I like the way that you left the tree to mature for 13 years (is there some sort of Christmas tree workers council directive that says no fake tree should be forced to work until they become teenage trees????)

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  31. Just don't think of orange kipper ties. Orange kipper ties. Orange kipper ties.

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  32. You dont need a new PC. You need to turn off all the extra programs you have running when the PC starts.

    Mike Lin has a free program I recommend.
    Startup Control Panel


    I came to your blog from Nurse Myra's blog.

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  33. Mr Mags and Eryl: I have found the tree.... and right now I should be decorating it if I'm ever to upload a picture!!

    Mr Logs: It was around 2005 when I noticed it looked a bit shabby!!! Cheeky beggar!!

    Nick: What do you think about orange corsets?

    Mr Elliot: Hello and Welcome!!!
    Er... I think I might have been exaggerating about the time it takes this PC to warm up... it feels like 20 minutes... but in reality, probably only 5! I am a woman, therefore, impatient.

    Mark P.S2: Hello and Welcome!!!
    Thank you for your help... although you have left me on the brink of asking a very stupid question... which actually I'm too scared to ask.

    Sx

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  34. Whenever I hear the Benny Hill tune, I think of Mr. Beastie.

    Don't you think it should be his theme tune?

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  35. MJ: Mr Beastie cannot run as fast as Benny... for one thing, he would trip over his sagging lurex posing pouch. It would be messy.
    Plus, Mr Beastie only chases food.
    Sx

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  36. There are no stupid questions.

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  37. I think I got my tree in Woolworths too. Oh what memories. Actually I can't remember anything about it at all. I do remember the Woodentops, what a load of shite that was really. :D

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  38. I'm reading these backwards...so I've seen your splendid tree, but not your clockwork PC

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