Thursday, 8 December 2011

Rapturous?

I smoke outside on the patio; I don't smoke indoors. This is fine, I don't mind and it gives me a chance to get outside for some fresh air. Smoking outside has its benefits - I get to hear things that non-smokers don't. Such as the dinosaur. Yes, the dinosaur. I say dinosaur because I can't describe the noise this creature makes in any other way, I can't even mimic its call. It sounds reptilian, I only hear it at night... it makes a single call up the musical scale - kind of like a smooth rattle, and then is silent... sometimes it sounds very close, which is a little unnerving... and I imagine that if I look upwards I will see double lidded raptor staring down at me from the guttering. Like something from the film Jurassic Park.
This all sounds a bit potty. I mentioned it to somebody, and he looked at me as though I was a bit potty, especially when I did the mimicking thing and made a sound like a choked up pheasant/peasant [whatever]. And then one night he heard it too and we looked at each other and mutually mouthed the word 'dinosaur'. But it can't be a dinosaur, so what is it?

40 comments:

  1. Could be an ex policeman - John Stalker.

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  2. Sounds like a rabbit with a smoker's cough.
    You have been warned.

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  3. Hello Scarlet:
    ...the drains...or, at least, in our experience of gurgles in the night, that is what it usually is. However, still reason to be afraid, very afraid...!!!

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  4. Am laughing at how you are getting fresh air by smoking outside. :-)

    As for what that sound could be -- and bearing in mind that my sister, a normally sane woman, insists that she SEES dinosaur birds in the fields around her house -- I'm going to say it's a dinosaur. Didn't miners digging some tunnel or another in Paris at the turn of the century insist that a pterodactyl shot out of the hole they'd created, only to die several minutes later?

    Otherwise, I like the Vicus Scurra's suggestion that it's some sort of warning from a rasping hare.

    Pearl

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  5. You'll be fine. It's the terrible silences you need to worry about.....

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  6. It's obviously the sound of hedges rattling. What do you mean, you didn't know hedges could rattle? What did they teach you at school?

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  7. Mr Chairman X4: No, no, no... the sound is too precise... too organised.
    My stalker dribbles, carries a violin and can barely tie his shoelaces... so I know the sound he makes... kind of a sucking screech followed by a tripping thud. Completely different sound altogether.

    Mr Scruussloos: An interesting theory, considering that the foxes round here have a bit of a taste for smoked bunny.

    The Top Hats: No, not my drains... so I will go with being very afraid!

    Pearl: I also get my daily dose of vitamin D by smoking outside when it's sunny!
    Oh crikey, I really am puzzled by this sound. I will have to try to record it... but it's not instantly repetitive. I hear the sound and then I might not hear it for another hour or so, it's going to be difficult to capture.

    Andy: Yes, I know... this usually means that I've been wandering around with my leoppard print ear muffs on. Embarrassing when in Tesco's.

    Nick: No, no, no.... I know a hedge when I hear one. Hedges are random and have no sense of rhythm. This creature has rhythm.

    Mr LX: Too howly! Too much OOOOOh! But thank you for the tune.

    Sx

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  8. It'd be a pity to find out really, wouldn't it? Unless it actually is a dinosaur, of course.

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  9. Sounds like a dog fox to me. They make a sound like a veloceraptor!

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  10. You have snakes there? Or snake collectors in the neighbourhood, who miss a fine specimen of rattlesnake? Can you reproduce it?

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  11. Z: I can't think what it can be. I'm going to get my wildlife book out tonight and see if I can find any animal sound that fit the discription.

    John: I'm not ruling a fox out... but I don't think it is... it doesn't sound quite like a mammal.

    Mr Mags: Oh, I will have a listen to this tomorrow... my only reservation is that the sound I'm hearing isn't at all relaxing... more like 'Oh shit, what's that...?'

    Pat: Not an owl! But I do have an owl related smoking experience. No owls were harmed during this experience, I may hasten to add!!

    Sx

    Will be logging off shortly to huddle by the fire. My sympathies to all those in Scotland who are getting the brunt of this dreadful weather. It's bad enough here but at least I still have electricity.

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  12. My experience with foxes is they sound like a woman screaming. Took me a while to figure that one out when living on the farm, because it was only at night. But when I saw the (tall but scrawny) fox stalking my (quite lithe and muscular) barn cats, I was quite surprised!

    Perhaps someone in your area has a pet Komodo dragon that is taking singing lessons?

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  13. Hi there, came through Andy. Jody here, kiwi living in Oakland. I only smoked for two years in Varsity but I do miss that comraderie of naughty people outside (never thought of the strange noise thing)

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  14. Doyouthinkysaurus?

    You must have both been fuming.

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  15. Never heard of a dinosaur on a patio..
    Looking on the bright side, if it only comes out at night it could always just be one of the undead....

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  16. Don't you live near-ish that castle where Uther Pendragon rode on the dragon's breath to get his end-away with Igraine?
    Could it be the dragon snoring?
    That's so exciting, watch out for stones with cutlery sticking out of them...

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  17. It's someone across the road trying to start an Austin Allegro with a clapped-out battery. At least, that's what my dinosaur is.

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  18. I know that noise! I always think it sounds like predator.

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  19. Much Better Than A Guard Dog.

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  20. Sounds like it could be a couple of foxes gekkering. Here's an array of fox calls, I hope it helps identify it.

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  21. I think it's important to ascertain if the noise is outside or inside your head.

    If it's inside, can any of your friends hear it as well because, if so, it means they're imaginary.

    I've lost so many friends this way.

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  22. Ponita: I'm very much taken by the dragon theory. It's getting chilly hear and I believe a dragon may supply an additional heating supply.

    Ms Last: Hello and Welcome!
    Oh yes, I love the comaraderie of smokers too. Lots of interesting chats and gossip that I'd never have if I was a non-smoker.

    Rog: Definitely a Yesithinkhesaurus!!
    Fuming, but not piping hot.

    Macy: Well, this did actually cross my mind... but the undead tend to thud about a bit more and leave arms and legs littering the driveway.

    Wendy: I'm warming to the dragon idea... and of course a dragon would be attracted to the heavy mix of Silk Cut and Issey Miyake perfume.

    Sx

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  23. Oh, Blogger is being weird this morning...

    Tim: Hello and Welcome!!
    Just for you, because you seem to be a fan Austin Allegro.

    Dicky: I have found the Predator noise, and yes it is very similar to this! So you're hearing it too? What the devil is it???

    Sx

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  24. Mitzi: It is similar to the Gekkering... but when I hear it it's just a single gekker! It does sound a little bit more like the predator sound... it has that reptilian twang... but probably more likely to be a fox than an alien.

    The Jules: Ha ha!!! No a real person has confirmed that he's heard it too! And I know he is real because I pinched him and he also made a strange noise.

    Sx

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  25. Mr Joey: What, one of these?
    That is scary.
    Sx

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  26. Tony: I missed you out, apologies!!
    If it's a baby bop then it'll also be cheaper than a guard dog.
    Sx

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  27. I suspect it will be a fox....

    If it is bothering you a lot I'll send Mrs B and Carruthers over to dance with it.....

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  28. Mr Logs: I so want it to be something exotic... yet harmless.
    Please do not dance anymore foxtrots.
    Sx

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  29. Mr Bene: Oops, I did a LOL and now I have to listen to this now.
    Sx

    I am getting my comments in a muddle.

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  30. I so want it to be something exotic... yet harmless.
    How about part fox part parrot – a farrot or possibly a parrox - which has got to be pretty exotic in anyone’s book

    As for going for harmless, you might have to think about quitting the cancer sticks ...

    lecture over....


    Please do not dance anymore foxtrots.
    Tell Mrs B...I warned her dancing was dangerous....

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  31. Mr Logs: I know! I may be in the mood for giving up again in the summer... well, I hope so.
    Sx

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  32. Scarlet, please tell us your owl related smoking experience

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  33. A chickentikkamassala on heat?

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